what will i do? it's so hard forcing myself to do something i really don't want to do. it's even hard to tell to people that you're really okay, when in fact i'm not.
it's really hard to pretend, i don't know what's right or wrong now. i don't know if the life i'm living now is worthwhile. i am so confused and frustrated. i don't know where i am in my life now, it seems like everything is not in place, it's really really absolutely hard living like this. i tend to be pretentious and stubborn at times, this is not right. i need some assurance and from my family and friends, but i don't know how or where to open it up to them, this is really hard =(
i am so saaaaad ='(
is this the kind of living i deserve?????
i am really really frustrated..hoping that someone will help me =(
is this the consequence of succumbing to the earthly and unnecessary things that the world is showing me? is God teaching me a lesson, but i can't seem to realize what it is, i feel so empty, like a well without water. i need the kind of fullness that will satisfy me, not only in the physical aspect, but i can't seem to force myself and have the discipline, desire, and courage to seek for it.
maybe i need a little more time. it's really disturbing me.
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