rema-fy

this should be real..or else?

it's just amazing how God is showing me visions, visions I still need to understand
and have someone else interpret it to me..

i know He'll help me in this process..

i promise to do this constantly to open my eyes of understanding and to expand my faith..

faith indeed is essential..

i love it how i dream about this person, just by thinking about this person before i sleep..it makes me wonder..will that dream ever become real??

woah

so many things happened this past few months..
work is both happy and crazy..
my life is a mess, i am a mess, my habits are downright ugly..
i am living on the edge right now..
exploring things that should not be explored..
dwelling on earthly, carnal things, and most of all..

being numb on what life should be all about..

i am so sad..

but i will be slowly recovering..

i can do this.

GOD IS WITH ME.

maundy thursday

and finally, i am free til easter sunday! wooooooot!!!!!

welcome to new beginnings...i'm quite anxious and nervous for monday...

i will definitely miss my life @ my former work, my new found friends and acquiantances..haaaaay...i think it will be the opposite in Citi..i mean the work, i hope soooo :p

welcome back rush hour, early morning rants, but then, i will be better, i promise..i will be mature enough to handle my future managers / teammates..sigh

for my first day as a 'bum', i had to pamper myself first, and then movie marathon all byyy myyysellllfff... =) i wanna do this more often... =)

haaay, all stories have endings, and i think my story still has not ended yet in Factset, there's a new book that is Citibank that is ready to be filled in with stories..stories that I believe will be more challenging =)

thank you Lord for giving me this blessing =)

@_@

Haaaaaay, I can't believe it! :P goodluck goodluckkkkkk :)

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eeeeeeeeee :D

Bakit type na kita!?????? :DDD

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I will take God's medicine daily and it will bring healing into my life.

I don't know if it's just a coincidence or not. But that passage just struck me. I don't know, maybe because I just feel weak because of the crazy work schedule I had this month, or maybe I'm just physically sick. Anyhow, I am just worried that I may have some kind sickness or disease that can't be detected now. But still, GOD is still bigger compared to all of that.

Although I must admit, I may be very bad at times, I am still grateful that I have a clean conscience that warns me if I'm crossing the wrong path, or if I am slowly swallowed by temptation. Really life has its own ways of fooling you, you just have to be smart to combat those foolishness. Foolishness that stems from the earhtly and carnal things.

I just realized that if you go out to the real world, everything seems to be alright, even though it's not. It's like everything done by the majority are meant to be imitated, just to feel that you really belong. I admit that I sometimes am persuaded by the earthly things around me even though it's not really good, or it will not help me physically, mentally, emotionally, and most of all spiritually.
But I guess, it all depends on oneself, and for now, I am still immature when it comes to handling those things.

True enough that God's word will bring healing to me not only in the physical context. So I guess that's the cause why I feel uneasy and unhealthy now :(

this is it

Exactly a month from now will be my first day in my second job =)

I just can't believe it. Indeed God is working in mysterious ways. Despite my everyday rants on my current job, I still received an unexpected blessing. When I say unexpected, it's really OUT OF THE BLUE.

Story behind it, I passed my resume to an unknown referrer who is working at Citi late January. Got a call for an interview with the line managers last February 21, almost a month after that, got a call that I passed the interviews and is for job offer. Next thing I know, I am now signing the contract, passed my resignation letter, and will start next month.

This is really a blessing. I really think I don't deserve this. But I guess I'm one of the lucky ones. Hoping that I'll survive my work there. I know I will. I will give my very best there. I will be a better employee and a much responsible one.

THANK YOU LORD SO SO SO SO SO MUCH!

crazy

Ang crazy lang ng shifting namin this month. What the hell, from morning to midshift to regular to graveyard. Crazy as hell lang talagaaaaa anak ng sampung birhen yaaaaan. Wat da paking layp I have. My head is turning upside down because of that. But I am grateful that I have the Lord that gives me strength and the love I needed. HE is everything to meeeee :)

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Only God knows

So, after a hellish three weeks wait, Citi called me again, they said that I now passed the interview with the first line managers. But this time, I still have to wait for another week or two for the job offer..grrrrr hoping that it will be sooner than I expected. Really praying for it.

God knows how I am eager to resign in my current job. God knows how painstakingly hard I wake up every morning just to go to the office and spend another 8 hours or so, just thinking of how to freakingly escape in this company. I just really want to resign, as in right now. This time I am really sure and hopeful that I can now leave this company and transfer to my dream employer. God knows how much I want a bigger salary that will help me save more and maybe travel to the different places I want
to go to. God knows how I am willing to risk some other things just to be able to resign from this company. And only God knows how grateful and lucky I am to have this kind of opportunities even though I'm still young and immature to seem to handle these things.

But still, only God knows when the HR will call back for my much awaited job offer.

Only HE knows. And I know this time around, it will be sweeter =)

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:/

It's so hard trying to do something you don't like anymore, and it's much harder to wake up everyday, and trying hard again.

from http://icanread.tumblr.com/

show-off pervert

Bakit may mga taong assuming at fame sucker!? Feeling nila sikat sila!?? Hell effin no! You will regret that later on!

Don't ever show off what you have or what you can do coz that won't change who you effin areee! TSSSS. :/

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Geee Veeeee

if it's God's will, it will happen

just waiting for the right time and opportunity =D

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TY :)

thank GOD we're healthy :))))))

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:)

You're sick, I'm sick.. let's be sick togetherrrr :)))))) awwww.

Happy birthday Papa, I love you.

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pffffft

i wannnnaaaa screaammmmm! wthhhhh!!!!!!!! i can't decide what to doooo!!!! i can't do this, i can't go there, i can't do thatttttt! please help meeeee, you're alwayssss ouuuutttttt!

i can't do this on my owwwwwwn!

i want to see resuuulttttts...ASAP!

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:P

AY ewan ko na lang..

Walang growthhh! Konting tiis, I can do this!

My time will come...SOON.

No one else can fix me although sometimes my heart tricks me into thinking someone / something else will do.

whatever

these days, i noticed some people (including myself) say things just to prove their worth, even if it means bragging about things that are insignificant and worthless..things that should not only be uttered but should be done..

all i can say is do not just brag about it, do it in a way that will leave others dumbfounded..do it with humility, and not just talk about in an i-will-do-it-just-to-gain-fame-and-to-please-others kind of way..do it constantly..

i can attest that i am not a doer and committed at times, but i don't brag about it, i just let it slip away at times or i just do it constantly..

maybe there's some people who just want to show-off how great they can be in a certain thing..but prove yourself first before voicing to the whole wide world how great you are, you can't please everybody, and even though you think you are, you're absolutely WRONG..

some people also tend to forget to put themselves into other's shoes..they don't have the sympathy and compassion to place themselves into other people's situations, i pity those people with this kind of attitude, but then that's the reality of life..it's a dog eat dog world life..only oneself can save oneself..at the very least...

that's what i've been noticing lately, and although i may be in those positions at times, i just keep in mind how i will feel if i were in the other person's position, no matter how stupid or great they may be..i may murmur about my boss and my work at times, but staying grounded is what's
keeping me sane.. :)

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fcuk

selfless materialistic pervert!

fcuk!!!!!!

you assuming douchebag! you haven't proved anything..you're soo gaaaaayyyy...

learn to have sympathy before saying anything....fuckkkk...please die nowwwwww!

please be considerate!!!! you're nothing compared to what they have gone through!!!!

gaaaay...prove you're worthy to be there!!!!!

i wish that you can survive living a life like that!!!

self-centered perverttttt!!!

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okaaaay

woooot! i was able to leave from work today. my so-called fcukin work..wth, am i still doing..i planned so many things, and they still remain as plans..or dreams..

i am just in awe of what's happenning.. awe with a FUL :p

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huwaaaay?

Bakit kailangan pa magtrabaho?

Bakit kailangan pa mabuhay?

Bakit yung mga gusto ko, ayaw saakin, yung mga ayaw ko, gusto ako?

Bakit may mga taong walang pakialam minsan?

Bakit ang sobra minsan ay bawal?

Bakit nakakakilig makita yung crush mo?

Bakit kung naghahanap ka, wala, pero kapag hindi ka naghahanap kusang dumadating?

Bakit kailangan may valid reason, kung wala naman talaga?

Bakit hindi ka na lang maging mid shift, para makita naman kita kahit papaano? <3

Bakit sobrang tanda mo na, wala kang balak magka-GF?

Bakit mas pinili ko pang mag-stay dito kesa lumipat sa magbibigay sa akin ng mas malaking sweldo?

Bakit ang labo ng trabaho ko?

Bakit hindi kami natuloy mag-cruise? Sayang din yun napakamura na pffffft

Bakit ang daming taong mean at bully?

Bakit meron pang walang kwentang boss?

Bakit ang daming B.I. sa paligid?

Bakit kailangan pang manggulo ng inosente at walang kamalay-malay na tao?

Bakit nakakaadik mag-shopping?

Bakit tumataba ako, minsan feeling ko ang gaan ko naman?

Bakit nakikita kita sa mga unexpected na paraan?

Bakit masyado akong masikreto?

Bakit pa ako nabuhay?

Bakeeettttt?

(to be continued)

di - le - muh

so an opportunity came, i guess i still should stay..
or i might regret the consequences..

higher pay with lesser experience or lower pay with much experience?

for now, i am choosing to STAY...

i know there's a right time for everything..

and i think it's not for NOW

i'll be waiting for that :D

faith&belief

for the past days, life has been sad and happy..sad because we're only 5 in the team now, and last week, we're only 2 girls in my shift..buti na lang same interests naman kami ng kasama ko..same plans and agendas when it comes to the future and sa work :DDDD

it's been sad also kasi there were a couple of problems sa team, especially sa boss, the burden he's carrying is so much hard, his sister passed away which really affected his performance, i am just hoping and praying that when he comes back, all will go back to normal and for him to not become distracted anymore...after reading his email to us asking for a bereavement leave, i felt more compassionate than ever, coz i used to be really apathetic especially nung college, to the point that i don't even participate in the activities our school called us for..so now, i am somewhat regretting that i am still not active when it comes to those kinds of activities...and i blame myself for that...

awhile ago sa church, someone shared the difference between having faith and believing..and this is what i understood..

FAITH - something you have
BELIEF - something you do

sounds confusing at first but then after further elaboration, faith is something innate in us, part of our nature..and belief is an action that may or may not stem from faith..if for example you ask permission from your parents to go somewhere, if they only say 'i believe in you', you should doubt a little, because they may or may not trust you that you'll not do anything that is not pleasing..but when they say 'i have faith in you', that's an ultimate response that they have trust in you..same as with your friends and loved ones..isn't it much better that they have faith in you rather than just believing you...i may sound too religious but that's one thing i realized today..i may not be an epitome of holiness to others especially to my friends, who really knows me, but i want people to lay a faith in me, even to the smallest things i seem not to excel at..

hehehehe..much of the drama and goody stuff..but it's been a tough week last week especially when i received a bad news about something i'm really eager to enter into..i always see myself unfortunate when it comes to situations like that, it's been like the third time that something like that happened..maybe next time i should not be too hopeful and confident..maybe i should not expect anything..because people can really be deceiving especially when you first met them..ughhhh...really disappointing but i'm still looking into the brighter picture :D

and once again...new week ahead...and i have a small agenda tomorrow, and i hope that i'd pass through it steadily..though i'm quite scared coz i think i need to do some explanation...tssskk..please just give me some favor, Lord :p

♥

saw him again after the christmas partyy...

sheyyyetttttt...gagong teammate na-number 1 kaya umakyat kami kaagad.

hmp. well, marami pang araw..and i wish maging 8:30 to 5:30 ang shift ko!!!!!

asa...

homaygahd

homaygahd...back to work again...more responsibilities i guess? starting next week.

but still, i am weighing the options, there are many oppurtunities out there!!!!

go grab it, before it's too late....

waaaaaahhhhhh...shyeeet, lumalakas ang pagbbreak ko..paano na?????

basta..we'll seeeee...

:D

happynewyear

double the effort na talaga..let's see..go go goooooooo :D

okay, nagparamdam siya ulit, and i know for a fact dahil break na sila..ugh..rebound?!

happy new year.

let's start 2011 right..

361 days more..

boom..